is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
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