when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
