Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize