That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
My feet surprised me
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
