i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
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