awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
