Are we in a gay sports bar?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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