i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
