Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
