Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize