There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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