so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize