Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.

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(845): View more from New York

I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(208): View more from Idaho

Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.

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(515): View more from Iowa

I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time

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(716): View more from New York

Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?

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(+61): View more from Australia

A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.

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(925): View more from California

We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"

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