Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
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