used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize