oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
