i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
