That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
