Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?