im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Actions speak louder than pants.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
