who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
