it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
