Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
