so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
