Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
