I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
