you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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