i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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