remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
