i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
