There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
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