i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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