Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
if only i could text you this smell
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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