dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Vodka?
Forever.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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