yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
