Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
