We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
