her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I skipped work to stalk him.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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