First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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