Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
