Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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