if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
