bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize