I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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