Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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