Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the liver wants what the liver wants
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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