East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
