is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
