i love accidental penises.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
