I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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