so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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