there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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