literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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